Catching Up...Part II

With April came our long-awaited California trip.  Ten days on the west coast...and meeting Jack's family.  We flew into San Francisco, picked up our rental car and headed north.  Instead of the small car we reserved, they offered an "opportunity" to upgrade to a Jeep Liberty...at a price of course.  Jack jumped at it and fell in love with that small red SUV.

Jack, Stacey and Jack

On our first day there, we saw Jack's son Jack, along with his wife Candice and their two daughters, Chanoa almost seven and Sienna the newest addition to the family at only two months old.  Later that day his daughter Stacey, her husband Brian and their daughter Kayla (almost ten) arrived.  We all went to dinner at Murillo's Mexican restaurant...a place Jack had good memories of...but the food was disappointing.  After months of hearing how West Coast Mexican food was so much better than East Coast Mexican, it tasted no better than what I've had 'back East' and not as good as my favorite place!  Jack said the place was not like he remembered.  But...we had a great first night with kids and grandkids!

Jack's brother Melvin and his wife Robyn held a family get together at their house and Jack's sister Mardell (who I met the previous summer) and their brother Terry came up from Fresno.  Sadly, Jack started coming down with something and had a hard time keeping up with all the activity and visits.  I felt just awful for Jack, but I had a great time meeting and getting to know everyone.  They liked me and I liked them...a success all around.  Now he had to keep me!

We visited the Jelly Belly Factory and I bought candy and 'stuffies" to take back to Katie and Jackson.  We also spent a day driving up through Napa to Calistoga, had a nice lunch and saw some beautiful country.  Jack introduced me to his favorite steak place, The Cattleman. We had an excellent dinner there with Melvin and Robyn. Made him promise to take me there again on our next visit!  On our way back to the airport, we did a quick visit to San Francisco and walked around Pier 39 on Fisherman's Wharf, but by then Jack was feeling miserable.  We stayed just long enough to buy some souvenirs for my grandkids and have some dinner before going on to the airport.  It was a long red-eye flight back home for a very sick Jack.

After we got home, I took Jack to Urgent Care and we found out he had pneumonia.  He spent two weeks at home recovering and was still tired and coughing when he returned to work.  It was at least a month before he was over it.  This was just the first of his summer health problems.  June brought a hernia repair and another few weeks of recovery, but only one of them at home.  In July it was cataract surgery.  Then there was a diagnosis of anemia thrown in somewhere along the line and a GI work-up.  They found some asymptomatic gall bladder problems in July that became troublesome.  By September he was feeling bad, ended up in the ER and went straight to the OR for an unscheduled cholecystectomy and another week at home plus several more to recuperate.

Now all that's left are the medical bills...

Next up...a job?

Catching Up...Part I

Well, my last post was welcoming in 2012 and here we are almost ready to welcome in 2013.  I was starting a new chapter in my life and wanted to document it but, as it turns out, there really is life after sixty and I got too busy living it to find time to write about it.  I'm going to play catch up now and see if we can't finish out 2012 before 2013 arrives!

JANUARY
January was get ready to move month.  Got a lot of smaller but vital things moved up to New Bern, ordered new bedroom furniture for Jack's and my new life together, bought airline tickets for California and found a new home for my kitties. 

Jack's lease on the townhouse does not allow cats, so my kitties were not going to be able to make the move with me.  It was fortunate that I adopted them from a rescue group and was able to return them to the group when I could no longer keep them.  I gave them about six weeks notice and they were able to find a foster home for them where they could stay together.  Giving them back was a very hard thing for me to do.

Jack had some bouts of cold feet during this time, but worked them out and the move went forward.  I didn't know until much later how difficult this commitment was for him.  The actual move-in date for furniture got pushed ahead several times and didn't happen until early March, but the last night I spent in my house was about three days before Christmas.  To this day, I never quite know what to say when someone asks how long we've lived together!

FEBRUARY & MARCH
February brought only a rather disappointing Valentine's Day...next year's will be better...and some serious health problems for my brother, Glen.  He suffered his first attack of Congestive Heart Failure, followed by a second, finally culminating in open heart surgery in March.  As this is all catch up rather than real time, I can say that he is now doing fine, but it was a long and difficult road.  I spent more time in Greenboro the month of March than I did in New Bern.  It was very scary to consider the possibility of losing my brother.  It also caused some strained feelings towards baby brother Ken.  I know he loves Glen and would have been devastated to lose him, but I was disappointed in the amount of time he was able to allocate to helping Glen during this time.  Fortunately, Glen has some very good friends and support at Unity Church who pitched in to help with animal care, visits, food and household chores.

During one of my many visits to Greensboro I ran into an ex-husband - Bud...husband number two.  He was at the hospital for a job interview and we had lunch together.  It was a nice visit.

Jack and I celebrated an annivarsary at the end of March. One year together as a couple.  It was a year full of ups and downs, but ended on an up.  Jack came home from work with roses, the first I had ever received from him, and sweet cards.  Then we went out for a romantic dinner at Morgan's Tavern, a place we particularly like.  It was a great anniversary celebration!

APRIL
April brought my sixty-second birthday, not a milestone, just another birthday.  I learned that Jack was not accustomed to giving birthday gifts and he learned that I AM accustomed to getting them.  Next year will be a better birthday...he promised!  I did have a great birthday celebration with Becca,Davis, Katie and Jackson!

The bedroom furniture I ordered in January finally arrived from High Point at the end of April.  It was, and is, beautiful and we are both happy with it.  Good thing as it is probably the last bedroom furniture we will ever have!  One of the downsides of getting older...realizing that your are approaching "lasts' in your life.

We went to California in April, but I will leave the details of that trip for my next installment.  It was a good trip overall, but heralded the start of a summer of medical issues for Jack.

Stay tuned...

Exhausting August...

Wow!  Seems August has kept me busy since this is only my second post for the month and the last day of August.  For a little while there, it almost felt I was running a Bed and Breakfast...sans breakfast as everyone helped themselves.

Lin, a girl I went to high school with visited Wilmington with her husband Dale and we had dinner together.  We went downtown for dinner at Elijah's...one of my favorites...then walked along the riverfront in Historic downtown Wilmington.  We hadn't seen each other in forty-three years and didn't know each other very well in high school - so it could have been an awkward evening, but it wasn't.  Jack and I enjoyed the evening with them and conversation flowed easily.  A nice reunion.

The next morning Glen came for a visit and brought Tasha Dog with him.  We ate out a lot, spent time visiting with Becca, Davis, Katie and Jackson and...Glen and Jack finally met.  Tasha enjoyed her time lounging on the porch!   As usual, Glen put in time cleaning up my computers - he's a computer whiz - and he started work upgrading Jack's computer.   He pronounced Jack a nice guy and said I can keep him!  I always enjoy time with Glen.

Next came Roy and Cynthia.  Roy's a former boyfriend and Cynthia is his best friend turned girlfriend.  They were in town so Cynthia could gather more information for her upcoming book on Gullah culture (due to be published by Christmas) and spent two nights with me.  It was a nice visit.

As Roy and Cynthia left, Ken and Ciera arrived.  They wanted one last weekend at the beach before Ciera went back to school.  Got some beach time in and some good food.  Sadly, Becca and family were out of town so the cousins missed each other.  It was good to see them again...a little  odd, but good.

A few days later I experienced a first in my life.  There was a 5.8 earthquake in Northern Virginia that was felt down here!  It created much excitement and frenzy for East Coasters unfamiliar with earthquakes.  I was sitting on Jack's couch watching something I'd DVR'd (he was at work) and the couch started to shimmy sideways.  My first thought was that the dog was scratching while leaning against the couch...until I saw her sitting on a chair!  I didn't know what it was until I later went online, but I'm proud to say I didn't freak!  Jack, being from California, knew exactly what it was immediately.

Gail, Jack and Mardell

Jack's sister Mardell came to town next.  She was in New Jersey visiting a friend and they traveled to Carolina Beach for a few days, so we made plans to meet in Wilmington.  We spent most of the day wandering downtown and visiting - with a stop for lunch at Elijah's, of course, and ice cream at Kilwins.  I really enjoyed meeting her and her friend Ellen.  We got along well; I liked them and they seemed to like me.  Jack later told me I received his sister's stamp of approval.

A few days later, Irene came to town - a rather unwelcome visitor as Irene was a Category 2 hurricane.  We battened down the hatches at my house, left the cats lots of food and water and retreated to Jack's to ride her out.  She was expected to bypass Wilmington and make landfall at Morehead City so we knew the cats would be safe.  We fared well - only losing power for about eight hours.  It got a little warm without A/C and have to admit we missed cable which stayed out about twenty-four hours...but really no great hardship.

Wonder what September has in store...

August Already?

My gosh...we're nearly half way through August!  Still no real job, but signed up with an agency to work flu-shot clinics this fall - so maybe an opportunity for some money.  The routine job hunting continues as always.

Jack and I have dinner plans tomorrow with a girl from my high school - and her husband.  After forty-three years I suppose I shouldn't be referring to her as a girl, though that's what she was the last time I saw her!  Funny how time changes perspective...though we were not close in high school, we are both excited and looking forward to seeing each other tomorrow.  We reconnected via Facebook.  Her husband is a car racing enthusiast as is Jack, so I am hoping the men will find common ground for conversation.

Saturday, Glen arrives for a visit - his first in a year.  I am looking forward to introducing him to Jack and just having time to visit!

Down the August road - more house guests and meeting Jack's sister...

July...

As usual, July has been a busy month. It is chock full of birthdays - in calendar order - Jack was 64, Michael was 38, Davis was 41 and Becca was 36.  Then there was Ken's yearly beach vacation visit.  We had a good time...as always.  The past two summers Ed was living here and did lots of cooking while they visited.  Prior to that we used to eat out most of the time.  This year was a combo of both - I did some cooking and we did some eating out.

The little cousins spent lots of time together, especially Katie and Ciera.  There were sleepovers in both directions and a trip to the theater with the girls to see Annie. Jackson spent that day with Daddy, while Ken and Matthew detailed my car (a great bonus!). Matthew went off on his own the first few days to hang with some college buddies.  Hard to believe he's twenty now.

We put in lots of beach and pool time.  The girls are becoming excellent swimmers and Jackson is getting braver about trying out his skills.  Katie even managed to coerce Grandma into going down the waterslide at the pool!  Ken took a picture, so my awkward plunge is preserved for posterity!  Jack spent a pool day with us and met Ken and the kids, while Katie and Jackson wore him out in the pool.  We can still hear Jackson calling out, "Mr. Jack! Mr. Jack!"

I've turned into a real beach grandma this summer and am sporting the best tan I've had in decades!  Becca has asked me several times if I am trying to give myself skin cancer.  I do protect my face, but haven't been as careful with the rest of me.  Have to admit I like the color on my arms and legs.

This Saturday Becca and Davis have a wedding in SC, so Katie and Jackson will spend the weekend with Grandma.   

I'm still anticipating visits from Glen and from my niece Laura and her family.  Ken has talked about coming down again, and Jack's sister will be in the area in a few weeks, as well as an old girlfriend of mine from high school.  Hard to say just what August will bring...

More Childhood Memories...

We moved from the house on 85th Ave to the house on Superior Road when I was seven.  The LIRR ran right behind the house and no one could sleep the first night we moved in.  Dad packed us up and we went somewhere for the weekend.  I don't remember what happened after that weekend, but eventually we hardly noticed the trains and were always surprised when someone else did.  Hardly noticed them, that is, except when Glen and I were competing.  We worked out a system that awarded points.  If a freight train ended with a red caboose, I got a point; if it ended with an orange caboose, Glen got a point.  If a passenger train ended with a double-decker car, point to Gail.  Standard single-decker passenger car at the end went to Glen.  Most of the trains ended with either an orange caboose or a single level passenger car...so Glen "won" most of the time.  It seems my habit of rooting for the underdog started early.

Life changed in the new neighbothood.  It was quieter and more affluent - only we weren't...affluent that it.  Mom and Dad kept me in the Catholic Elementary School in the old neighborhood - so I went to school with one group of kids, lived near another and didn't fit in either place.  There were no kids running around in the streets or jumping rope on the sidewalk...they played quietly in each other's back yards...and ignored me, the Italian Catholic girl who didn't go to their school.  It hurt being snubbed regularly, but I learned to keep quiet and pretend to ignore it.   At some point I made friends with three or four boys who attended the same Catholic school I did...Johnny Rebhann, Jimmy Grennen, Tommy McMahon and sometimes Kevin Heath  Kevin was orphaned after a few years and went to live with relatives in Michigan.  It felt so strange to have a friend with no parents.  It was hard during the times when the boys would go through a "girls are yucky" stage - but they ultimately became the source of some limited experimentation (I hated being the "victim" of the "TV game" as the boys called it), my first kiss (Jimmy...I was 14 and devastated to later learn that the only reason he kissed me was to win a bet among them as to who could get kissed first; I tried to get him to "like" me for years after that) and my first boyfriend (Johnny...I was 14 and had had a crush on him since the second grade).

When I was eleven, Mom had a surprise pregnancy and I got a baby brother just before my twelfth birthday.  It was exciting at first - brought out my nurturing qualities.  I learned to change diapers, feed and burp and rarely went anywhere without the baby carriage.  After a while it got old, but the bond was established...really more mother-child than big sister-little brother.  It remains that way to this day.

Day to day life was not particularly memorable.  Glen and I tended to stay out of Dad's way as his moods were volatile...though I was better at that than Glen was.  For the few years that Amy was with us, I was enamoured of her life and crazy about her boyfriend, Richie.  She introduced me to rock 'n' roll and taught me how to dance, but she left home when I was about ten.

As time went on, I made a few girlfriends...Nettie Roos, the Dutch only child whose Mom was six feet tall, rode every where on a bicycle and taught us how to do Eeeny, Meeny, Miney Moe in Dutch;  Alene Zully, the oldest of five sisters was my friend in the sixth grade but then moved away to Oyster Bay; Carol Lee Pallin, my friend in the seventh and eighth grades, hung out with me and the boys and became Tommy's girlfriend for a little while. 

High school days rolled around and things changed again.  I found a Best Friend.  Mary Anne Rotolo was a year behind me in school, but she lived in my neighborhood and went to the same Catholic HS I did.  We became inseperable and were often taken for sisters with our dark Italian good looks and long black hair - only I am 5'3" and she is 5'10" - we were a female Mutt and Jeff!  She was from a large family that welcomed me with open arms.  I spent a lot of time there during my HS years and had a mad crush on her brother, Joey.



74 Superior Road
Bellerose, New York

 I lived in the house on Superior Road for fourteen years - from the time I was seven until the day of my wedding at age 21 - in the front upstairs bedroom with the ugly green and pink wallpaper and two windows overlooking the rooftop.  I remember the pantry with the freezer big enough to hold a body, the red breakfast nook, the knotty pine all over the kitchen and basement, the brick fireplace that never saw a fire, the window seat in the foyer that held Dad's old books and the great big walk up attic that I loved to retreat to.

My parents sold the house and moved south decades ago, but I can still see the interior like it was yesterday.  I have good memories and bad memories of those fourteen years...and more as I returned often with my babies to visit.  Thanksgivings around the dining room table...and the trees on the dining room wallpaper.  My grandparents all sitting out in lawn chairs in the backyard...conversation suspended every time a train went by.  Glen and I in the yard waving at the engineers...cheering if they waved back.  A slap in the face from Dad when I was fourteen - I didn't speak to him for a week and he never did it again.  Mom bathing my new son in the kitchen sink.  Dead birds in the chimmney and bugs in the carpet - I was glad to see the ugly green carpet go.  So much green in that house, I did not use green in my own house for almost forty years!  Grandmommy fallng in the basement and breaking her hip.  My first baby shower held in the living room.  A quickie with my fiance` in the basement when everyone else was asleep.  The mailman shouting through the screen door when an airmail letter arrived for me from my Marine boyfriend.  Guys subjected to the third degree when they came to take me on dates.  Denting the rear corner of the house with Mom's car when I came up the driveway too fast - Mom thought it was an earthquake - I thought life as I knew it was over - but Dad was surpisingly calm about it.  Hiding at the top of the stairs as a kid listening to Mom and Dad fight.  The conversation in the kitchen when I told Mom and Dad I was getting married.  And another conversation a few years later in the same kitchen, when they told me they were thinking about getting a divorce (the divorce never came to be).  So many things helped shape the woman I am today...

...always hoping for a red caboose.

Another Road Trip...

Just returned from another road trip.  Went to Florida this time to visit family - Ed's brother Mike, his wife Lot, and kids Tony, Gina and Vinnie.  They live on Merritt Island, just minutes from the beach.  I often forget how much I like Florida till I arrive; there's nothing prettier than a row of stately palm trees silhouetted against a sunny blue sky.  The landscape just shouts out, "Beach!"

We started out Monday and drove to Savannah, where we had a reservation in the Historic district.  Spent some time walking along the river, bought some pralines (a favorite of mine), then headed to Uncle Bubba's for dinner.  Uncle Bubba's Oyster House is situated outside town on a marsh; there was a wait for an inside table so we took one out on the deck.  I was happily surprised to learn there are some resident cats in the vicinity of the deck and they will approach customers in the hopes of being fed.  They were the highlight of my evening!  Ed was more interestered in the grilled oysters, which came from Apalachicola and were very good!  After the oysters and a seafood dip we split a "Full Bubba" - shrimp, scallops, oysters and catch of the day - and couldn't come close to finishing it.  A nice evening in a favorite city!

Drove the rest of the way to Merritt Island the next day.  We always have a good visit with Mike and Lot and this time was no exception.  Lot's a great cook and they are both congenial hosts.  I feel very at home there.  Three year old Vinnie is a charmer and immediately jumped in the pool to show off his rather impressive swimming skills to Uncle Bud and Aunt Gail.

The plan was to just relax and visit.  Henry, their other brother, was coming over from the Gulf side for a visit on Thursday.  We would relax around the pool and feast on shrimp.  Unfortunately, Henry had a stroke on Wednesday!  After a flurry of phone calls to gather information and let other family members know, we made a plan to drive across state to see Henry.  The trip was an arduous one; Mike got lost at least three times, making the three hour drive in only four and a half hours!  On the upside, Vinnie traveled like a trooper, never once getting whiney or cranky.  Most importanly, we saw Henry - he is recovering, the few symptoms he has are expected to resolve and he returned home on Saturday.

We returned home to NC on Friday and have been spending the weekend with Ed's boys.  Tim and Alex came down from Michigan and NY to celebrate Tim's birthday, which means lots of good meals at both Mark's house and ours!

We're already planning our next trip to Merritt Island...for Thanksgiving.

A Sibling Reunion...

Last week my brother Glen and I reunited with our half sister Amy - after thirty-nine years!

Gail, Glen and Amy ~ July 18, 2010

We lost touch with each other due to circumstances not of our making and our various efforts to locate one another hit obstacles time and time again.  Then a little over a year ago I hit paydirt.  After a number of letters and phone calls between Pennsylvania and North Carolina getting us all  reacquainted, Glen and I hatched a plan for the three of us to get together, presented it to Amy, and our reunion was born.

We spent four days together at my house near the beach.  We talked a lot, ate a lot, did a little sightseeing and talked some more.  We discovered various characteristics of our parents and grandparents in each other and retold story after story of our childhood experiences.  We probably spent more time reminiscing than we did talking about the missed years!

When they retired twenty years ago, Mom and Dad gave me their dining room set and it was a really great moment when we realized that we three were sitting around the same table where we ate dinner together so many times as kids!  Seems no matter what our differences today, the bond created growing up together is what binds us together now.

Amy met some of her nieces and nephews for the first time last week and I am planning to visit my niece and meet my nephews next month.  Our family is a little larger now and we won't lose touch again.