Catching Up...Part IV

Summer was devoted to Jack's medical issues and to my learning a new job and adjusting to being in the workforce again.  Then came September...

As Jack was waking up from his emergency cholecystectomy (gall bladder removal), I got a call from his sister Mardell...with bad news.  Jack's younger brother, Robin had been found dead at his home in California.  He was 51.  I hated having to tell him that.  As more details emerged, we learned he had been murdered!  (details here)  Stabbed seventeen times!  It was horrible.  Two weeks after Jack's surgery we flew out to California for the Memorial Service.  I think Jack needed to be with his family at that time.  It was a nice service and a good family gathering but we were exhausted.  We flew out and back in less than forty-eight hours.  Not something I want to do again!  Talk about jet lag...

In Novemeber we had tickets to a race in Charlotte.  Bought them and made reservations months earlier.  We were almost too tired to go and might not have, had we not already had the tickets.  While there we visited Concord Mills, a huge outlet mall.  We were looking in a jewelry store (a favorite pasttime of mine) and saw a lovely solitare at a great price.  Jack asked me if I wanted it.  I said "of course" and asked him if he knew what it meant.  He said he did.  I told him he hadn't asked the question...so he proposed right there in the jewelry store!  I'm so glad we went to Charlotte!  Oh...the race was fun too.

 

Novemeber rolled right into December...and Christmas...and color coordinated casts for Katie and Jackson! 

 

Just before Christmas, Jackson experienced his first broken bone.  He was racing Katie on his scooter and got his foot stuck...as he put it, "The scooter stopped and I didn't."  He flew over the top and landed on his right arm, fracturing both the radius and the ulna.  Damn, that must have hurt!  He said, "I tried not to cry, but I screamed."  My poor sweet boy.  At the same time, Katie has been experiencing pain in her right heel.  Turns out the growth plate is inflammed, a rather common occurence among athletic children (Sever's Disease).  It goes away when they stop growing.  In the meantime, resting it helps the pain, so Katie's right foot has been in a cast for the last few weeks to let her heel rest.  The hope is that when the cast comes off, the pain will be gone...and not come back.  Hope so!

 

That catches us right up to the present...awaiting the New Year. I am sure there are all kinds of things I've missed and lots of topics I could explore, but for now this will have to suffice.  Until next time...

Catching Up...Part III ~ A Job

On June 6, 2012, after two years, 3 months and 25 days of unemployment (but who's counting), I started working again.  Over that course of time, I applied for nearly one hundred jobs...and the one I got was one I didn't actually apply for!

I received a call from a head hunter, uh...I mean recruiter, asking me if I would be interested in a management position with a Hospice.  Now management is not really my forte but, if they wanted to talk to me, I was game.  After a few more phone calls, I went for an interview.  The interview went well and one of the interviewers (Gene) really seemed to like me...but I didn't get that position.  A few weeks later Gene emailed asking if I would be interested in talking about another position  I went to a different office and interviewed with Sabrina.  She seemed to like me and said she'd call in a couple of weeks.  I waited for weeks on end without hearing anything and finally wrote it off as another job that went to someone else.  About that time I got a phone call from Sabrina's manager, Jessica, just returning from maternity leave.  She said she'd heard good things about me and could I come in an talk with her...a third interview!  Two days after that interview she called with a job offer.  I almost couldn't believe it, perfect timing since my unemployment had just run out!

I have been a Hospice Case Manager for a bit more than six months now.  I work with good people and have learned a lot in that time.  Hospice is like no other type of nursing.  No one gets better, all our patients are on the road to death.  My job is to make that journey a little easier, for both the patient and his/her family.  My experiences will likely be the subject of future blog posts! 

The best part of the job...a regular paycheck.  I'd almost forgotten how nice it is to have money!

Sandy Hook

The tragedy of Sandy Hook has affected me like no other.  I can't wrap my head around it.  The first two days after it happened, I couldn't watch the details on the news or look at the pictures of the victims without feeling sick to my stomach.  On Sunday, I finally brought myself to read the details and look at the pictures of the twenty children and the six adults who died with them and it still made me feel sick.  The funerals are beginning now and seeing those little coffins and grieving parents brings me to tears.  When I see pictures of their little smiling faces, I can't help but see my grandchilden's faces...and can not imagine a world without them.

What kind of monster guns down his own mother and then goes on to slaughter 20 six and seven year-olds in their classrooms?  Children are supposed to be safe in school.  My daughter drops her kids off at school every morning and goes about her business without worry.  Imagine the horror of learning your child was gunned down in kindergarten.  What of the children who survived seeing their friends and classmates murdered before their eyes?  Terrifying can't begin to describe it.

What kind of society are we, when there are people more concerned with their "right" to own guns than they are with the loss of these children?  The response of decent people is horror and a desire to prevent something like this from happening again, which naturally draws gun control into the conversation.  This is when the gun nuts come out of the woodwork.  There have even been suggestions that we need more guns and that teachers should be armed!  Where is reasoned thought and compassion?

This is not the first mass shooting; there have been others...Columbine, Virginia Tech, Aurora, CO, Oregon mall, Gabrielle Giffords...all in recent memory.  Somehow this one feels even worse.  This one feels personal.  Two mothers wrote a piece examining why, entitled What Six Looks Like. It really hit home.  I too, know what six looks like...it looks like my precious grandchildren and that makes it personal. 

Catching Up...Part II

With April came our long-awaited California trip.  Ten days on the west coast...and meeting Jack's family.  We flew into San Francisco, picked up our rental car and headed north.  Instead of the small car we reserved, they offered an "opportunity" to upgrade to a Jeep Liberty...at a price of course.  Jack jumped at it and fell in love with that small red SUV.

Jack, Stacey and Jack

On our first day there, we saw Jack's son Jack, along with his wife Candice and their two daughters, Chanoa almost seven and Sienna the newest addition to the family at only two months old.  Later that day his daughter Stacey, her husband Brian and their daughter Kayla (almost ten) arrived.  We all went to dinner at Murillo's Mexican restaurant...a place Jack had good memories of...but the food was disappointing.  After months of hearing how West Coast Mexican food was so much better than East Coast Mexican, it tasted no better than what I've had 'back East' and not as good as my favorite place!  Jack said the place was not like he remembered.  But...we had a great first night with kids and grandkids!

Jack's brother Melvin and his wife Robyn held a family get together at their house and Jack's sister Mardell (who I met the previous summer) and their brother Terry came up from Fresno.  Sadly, Jack started coming down with something and had a hard time keeping up with all the activity and visits.  I felt just awful for Jack, but I had a great time meeting and getting to know everyone.  They liked me and I liked them...a success all around.  Now he had to keep me!

We visited the Jelly Belly Factory and I bought candy and 'stuffies" to take back to Katie and Jackson.  We also spent a day driving up through Napa to Calistoga, had a nice lunch and saw some beautiful country.  Jack introduced me to his favorite steak place, The Cattleman. We had an excellent dinner there with Melvin and Robyn. Made him promise to take me there again on our next visit!  On our way back to the airport, we did a quick visit to San Francisco and walked around Pier 39 on Fisherman's Wharf, but by then Jack was feeling miserable.  We stayed just long enough to buy some souvenirs for my grandkids and have some dinner before going on to the airport.  It was a long red-eye flight back home for a very sick Jack.

After we got home, I took Jack to Urgent Care and we found out he had pneumonia.  He spent two weeks at home recovering and was still tired and coughing when he returned to work.  It was at least a month before he was over it.  This was just the first of his summer health problems.  June brought a hernia repair and another few weeks of recovery, but only one of them at home.  In July it was cataract surgery.  Then there was a diagnosis of anemia thrown in somewhere along the line and a GI work-up.  They found some asymptomatic gall bladder problems in July that became troublesome.  By September he was feeling bad, ended up in the ER and went straight to the OR for an unscheduled cholecystectomy and another week at home plus several more to recuperate.

Now all that's left are the medical bills...

Next up...a job?

Catching Up...Part I

Well, my last post was welcoming in 2012 and here we are almost ready to welcome in 2013.  I was starting a new chapter in my life and wanted to document it but, as it turns out, there really is life after sixty and I got too busy living it to find time to write about it.  I'm going to play catch up now and see if we can't finish out 2012 before 2013 arrives!

JANUARY
January was get ready to move month.  Got a lot of smaller but vital things moved up to New Bern, ordered new bedroom furniture for Jack's and my new life together, bought airline tickets for California and found a new home for my kitties. 

Jack's lease on the townhouse does not allow cats, so my kitties were not going to be able to make the move with me.  It was fortunate that I adopted them from a rescue group and was able to return them to the group when I could no longer keep them.  I gave them about six weeks notice and they were able to find a foster home for them where they could stay together.  Giving them back was a very hard thing for me to do.

Jack had some bouts of cold feet during this time, but worked them out and the move went forward.  I didn't know until much later how difficult this commitment was for him.  The actual move-in date for furniture got pushed ahead several times and didn't happen until early March, but the last night I spent in my house was about three days before Christmas.  To this day, I never quite know what to say when someone asks how long we've lived together!

FEBRUARY & MARCH
February brought only a rather disappointing Valentine's Day...next year's will be better...and some serious health problems for my brother, Glen.  He suffered his first attack of Congestive Heart Failure, followed by a second, finally culminating in open heart surgery in March.  As this is all catch up rather than real time, I can say that he is now doing fine, but it was a long and difficult road.  I spent more time in Greenboro the month of March than I did in New Bern.  It was very scary to consider the possibility of losing my brother.  It also caused some strained feelings towards baby brother Ken.  I know he loves Glen and would have been devastated to lose him, but I was disappointed in the amount of time he was able to allocate to helping Glen during this time.  Fortunately, Glen has some very good friends and support at Unity Church who pitched in to help with animal care, visits, food and household chores.

During one of my many visits to Greensboro I ran into an ex-husband - Bud...husband number two.  He was at the hospital for a job interview and we had lunch together.  It was a nice visit.

Jack and I celebrated an annivarsary at the end of March. One year together as a couple.  It was a year full of ups and downs, but ended on an up.  Jack came home from work with roses, the first I had ever received from him, and sweet cards.  Then we went out for a romantic dinner at Morgan's Tavern, a place we particularly like.  It was a great anniversary celebration!

APRIL
April brought my sixty-second birthday, not a milestone, just another birthday.  I learned that Jack was not accustomed to giving birthday gifts and he learned that I AM accustomed to getting them.  Next year will be a better birthday...he promised!  I did have a great birthday celebration with Becca,Davis, Katie and Jackson!

The bedroom furniture I ordered in January finally arrived from High Point at the end of April.  It was, and is, beautiful and we are both happy with it.  Good thing as it is probably the last bedroom furniture we will ever have!  One of the downsides of getting older...realizing that your are approaching "lasts' in your life.

We went to California in April, but I will leave the details of that trip for my next installment.  It was a good trip overall, but heralded the start of a summer of medical issues for Jack.

Stay tuned...

New Year, New Beginning...

Well, three weeks into the the New Year and I'm getting used to it being 2012.

I will turn sixty-two this year, which means I will be eligible for Social Security benefits, should I want to take them.  It rather boggles my mind.  I've never been able to imagine being old enough for SS - it's always felt like it was off in the distant future.  Realizing it is upon me is a bit of a reality shock!

No New Year's resolutions for me.  I've never had any luck with them.  While, in one respect, the New Year can feel like a beginning, in most ways, it just feels like a continuation of winter...and I usually can't find any good reason to want to "turn over a new leaf".

This year the New Year actually is a beginning; it is ushering in the start of a new chapter in my life.  I am moving...to a new life in a new city (town?)...moving in with Jack, into his townhouse in New Bern.  Seventy-five miles and ninety minutes from home...and from Becca, Katie and Jackson.  I never expected to move even a short distance from them, so this is a good indicator of how much building a life with Jack means to me.  I'm going to miss them a lot and plan to make that drive between New Bern and Wilmington on a regular basis.  I'm going to miss Wilmington too.  New Bern is quite lacking in things to do, places to go, and good restaurants; Wilmington, on the other hand, lacks Jack!  It is a temporary move, to be sure, only until Jack retires in the next two to three years...then we will return to Wilmington.

I may be nearing sixty-two, but falling in love makes me feel more like twenty-two.  Right now life feels good and I'm happy.